Confessions of a Chronic Starter

Family, can I be real with y’all for a minute?

Lately, I’ve been wrestling with some weird feelings—confusion about my direction in life, and if I’m honest, I might be teetering on the edge of burnout.

Here’s the problem: I get excited about something, dive in headfirst, and then... poof, I’m over it. This toxic cycle of starting strong, burning out, and abandoning projects has been repeated in my life forever. It’s a bad habit I hate to admit I have, and I’m determined to break it—especially with this blog and my art.

Does anyone else struggle with this? I’ve realized that when I start something new, I pile on unrealistic expectations—when I’ll do it, how perfectly it’ll turn out. It’s toxic, and it has to stop.

To be real, I even started feeling this way about this blog. And that’s wild because I love writing! I’ve been journaling since the sixth grade. I recently tossed a box with at least 20 diaries. Don’t ask why—let’s unpack that later. (Spoiler alert: It was part of cleaning my spiritual house.), but the point is: that writing has always been my thing. So why does pressure steal my joy?

I was talking to a friend recently and said, “Yeah, I’m all over the place.” She agreed, saying, “But you’ll find your purpose.” That hit me. It wasn’t her agreeing that hurt—it was realizing how seen I was for being into everything. A conversation with my dad confirmed it. He said he’d struggled with starting and stopping projects, too, and tied it to mental health. That got me thinking: Is this really why I do this?

So, like any millennial, I Googled, “Why do I start so many projects and never finish them?”

Here’s what I found:

1. Perfectionism: Fear of failure or not meeting standards causes completion anxiety. Yep, that’s me.

2. Lack of focus: Jumping from idea to idea without sticking to one thing. Also me—getting better since walking with God, but still me.

3. Starting too big: Biting off more than I can chew. Guilty!

4. ADHD: While I’m not diagnosed, the hyperfocus vs. no-focus struggle? Relatable.

   
   

Here’s the truth: completing things is hard. People who struggle with this—really struggle.

So, what am I doing about it?

1. Making lists: I’ve made a master list of everything I want to do, need to do, and haven’t finished. It’s all organized in a lovely notebook I got from Targé (Target) with sections that use colors, numbers, and thoughts—it’s organized chaos, but it makes sense to me!

   
   

2. Prioritizing: Once I have the list, I break it down further. I categorize tasks into things I can do quickly and things that require more time, money, or effort. Then I eliminate the ones I’m not truly committed to. Honestly, this helps me realize how much I overcommit to things I don’t even care about. Because what I really ask myself is why do I want to do this and honestly if its aligned with some bull crap I know it's going to stress me out later.

   
   

3. One project at a time: This has been huge. I’ve trained (feels more like torture sometimes) myself to pick one project, gather my materials, and create a plan. For bigger projects, I break them into smaller tasks and check off each step as I go. This keeps me from falling into the trap of starting a “side project” halfway through the first one. Because I will be quick to tell myself "oh this was easy I bet I could do 2 projects at a time" NO MA AM!

   
   

4. Taking my time: Rushing has always been my default. I used to think I had to do everything immediately or I’d run out of time, but slowing down has been life-changing. Sometimes, just thinking or sleeping on a new idea helps me realize I don’t actually want to do it. Plus, it reminds me of God’s timing, which is always perfect.

   
   

5. Scheduling breaks: If you’re like me, you don’t know what “taking a break” even means. To fix this, I schedule downtime, well my husband scheduled it technically. Every night at 7:30, my household has quiet time—no devices, no TV, just peace. My husband and I also schedule intentional break days. For me, that often looks like hitting the gym and spending quiet time in the sauna (don’t judge me; it works!).

   
   

6. Learning my patterns and giving myself grace: I’ve started to identify triggers for my anxiety and perfectionism. If I can heal from those triggers, I do; if not, I avoid them. I’ve also learned to reframe my expectations to be more reasonable and obtainable because sometimes I live in a fantasy world. As long as I’m aligned with God’s purpose, I’m doing just fine.

   
   
   
   

Here’s what I’ve taken away from this journey so far: I’ve connected a lot of my struggles to anxiety. Perfectionism doesn’t just come from anxiety—it fuels it. I want to dive deeper into this topic, but that’s a post for another day. If you’re interested in that deep dive, let me know.

For now, let me ask you: Do you struggle with inconsistency? If so, how do you deal with it? Let’s talk about it!